POP UP WINDOWS AND CYBERNETIC BRAIN IMPLANTS
BY ANDREW DIXON HUTTON
Raoul Diaz was abruptly awoken at 4:37 AM by an insurmountable amount of chaos pounding inside his brain.
Everywhere it was:
**ENLARGE YOUR DICK EXTRA INCH!**
**FREE BIO-ORGANIC HEROIN**
**YOUR GIRLFRIEND LEAVED YOU ALONE BECAUSE OF YOUR COCK SIZE!!**
While the images and sounds pulsed in his head, Raoul cursed his new brain implant. Its not like implants were new or anything, everyone had been getting them for years. Without one, you weren't anyone, in Tokyo, or LA, and now, in St. Louis with his new hardware installed Raoul was someone. It turns out though, that he was someone, who was, currently being so extremely bombarded by mental advertisements that his body had succumb to a state of paralysis.
Earlier that day Raoul was working at Leroy's Juice Hut on steeple street when Ellen walked in the door. She walked slowly yet with purpose, it was the way Raoul wished he walked, yet no matter how much he tried, he would only trip, over his scuffed, vulcanized rubber traction boots.
Raoul thanked his luck circuits every day that Ellen was a regular customer, and if you were to either, hypnotize or give him hallucinogenic drugs with out his knowledge (since he would never willingly consent to such a savage practice) Raoul would definitely admit to you, that Ellen's patronage of Leroy's Juice Hut on steeple street was one of the few things in his life that kept him from committing suicide while alone on Saturday nights.
Now this day was an interesting day for Raoul to say the least. You see, Bob's International House of Cybernetic Brain Implants had just opened up a block away from Leroy's Juice Hut. This was amazing news for Raoul since he was a victim (like so many others) of the new American dream. The dream that you will become monumentally rich and famous without even trying, and that once this happens you will never have to work again, and everyone will love you, even if you’re not an interesting person. This never happened to Raoul. He wished it had though. It haunted his dreams at night, and every year on his birthday he could feel his frail grip on the hope of this ever happening growing weaker and weaker.
The grand opening of Bob's International House of Cybernetic Brain Implants was not the only notable event that day, you see, Leroy Jr. the new manager of Leroy's Juice Hut since Leroy Sr. retired, had taken a liking to Raoul. So much so that he decided to give Raoul a bonus, and a raise (though it was a small one). Maybe it was out of the kindness of his heart or maybe it was because he didn't want to see his best employee dead in a pool of his own blood. Even Leroy Jr. wasn't sure, though he was sure that he had indeed given Raoul a bonus and a raise (though it was a small one), this was certain.
Raoul's main reason for joy though, what that today Ellen had showed some extra interest in him. The reason for this extra interest was that this afternoon, Ellen that day had walked in her husband having sex with some bitch. This didn't actually surprise Ellen, she had been fairly sure that her husband was cheating on her for a matter of months. The dead giveaway was when he stopped making eye contact with her. This wasn't the only sign, just the most obvious. There were three days when he called in sick to their marriage, and the messages on the answering machine from his "secretary". Either way when Ellen walked into her bedroom to find her husband's naked white ass sticking up in the air, with the other end deep inside some girl half her age Ellen wasn't mad. No…. Ellen was excited, she had prepared for this moment the day her husband could no longer meet her eyes, and now felt a rush of adrenaline as the proof she had longed for night after night stared her smack dab in the face, while slowly bobbing up and down.
Ellen hadn't made any noise when she entered the room save a small gasp, so she was able to leisurely remove the large handgun with the pearl grip from her hand bag and point it at her husband's back before making her presence known. The look on her husbands face was priceless and would stay there forever since she immediately put a bullet through his forehead. It was an unexpected coincidence of trajectory that the girl died in the same moment as Ellen’s husband. She hadn't planned this, not to say that she wasn't planning on killing the girl, because she was and in cold blood in cold blood undoubtedly. She just didn't think it would be so quick.
Raoul was not used to women treating him like a human being and Ellen's flirtatious behavior set him off like an interplanetary cruise ship launched from space port America, down in New Mexico. Since brain implants had been the only thing on Raoul’s mind today he naturally told Ellen about the new emporium down the street and his plans to go to that new emporium on his break, and use his bonus to get a brain implant and finally be somebody.
Having murdered her husband and his young lover in cold blood earlier that day Ellen was living life on the edge. When Raoul brought up the idea she said “Fuck it why not!” Its not like she had a family to worry about.
After getting their implants on Raoul's break, the two of them closed the store and fucked on the juice counter since Leroy Jr. had gone home for the day. This violated twelve different health and safety codes. Raoul used his new implant to look up exactly what codes they were violating.
At 7:37 PM Tokyo time, in Tokyo, a 14 year old kid got sick of watching "Step By Step" re-runs. So he decided to take revenge on the west.
First Ellen's head pounded with electric chaos.
Next Raoul began to claw his eyes out in agony.
Ellen forcefully banged her head against her hardwood floor.
This lead to a skull fracture.
Raoul ripped his own eyeballs out of his head.
Ellen lost consciousness.
Raoul did not and was able to feel his brain liquefy.
It was 4:49 AM, Ellen and Raoul were dead.